Saturday, March 12, 2016

A Pluthera of Excuses

photography by Hannah Garland
Spring is poking her head out to the world all over.  Even in spots that are still watching snow fall have some beautiful colors showing here and there.  Here in Southern California I see bright purples and reds and yellows, soft lavenders and pinks and whites.  It is glorious to walk with my mom all around her home.  The gardeners are clipping and raking and gathering.  The infrequent rain storms only add to the beauty.

Photo by
"It's so beautiful outside!  I love this season.  Can you believe's almost Easter! I love Easter candy :)  Those Cadbury eggs only come once a year.  I should to eat some while I can."

"There is so much happening in my apartment complex; I have had so much stress.  I am too tired to make dinner.  What should I do?  Oh yeah!  EZ-Burger across the street has garden burgers.  I'm going WILD with it."

"Hmmmm...I am passing the donut shop and they have such great apple fritters.  I deserve one of those, even though I know the yeast doesn't agree with would be good to have while I wait for Mom's lunch to be over."

"I deserve it."
"I need it."
"It is much easier."

Image from
I listened to the excuses my sweet tormented manipulative alcoholic neighbor had while drinking and shook my head.  Poor thang.  He can say this is all about his pain but we all know this is just an excuse.  And then I thought about my own excuses to overeat or to eat unhealthily...  And while how I eat doesn't fall under the clinical term "food addiction," it manifests itself in many of the same ways.

The excuses...I deserve this.  I earned this.  I don't have a problem; I just like to eat.  I'll go back to Weight Watchers on Monday.  One piece of cake won't be a problem.
Photo from Lou Paun/
I quit smoking in 2001.  Cold turkey.  Almost three packs a day cold turkey.  Over Spring Break.  I had just got up one morning and said, "That's it."  I liked smoking.  I wasn't concerned with health issues.  I just woke up and decided it was time to stop.  Wasn't easy (for me or for Doug :) ) but it happened.

Thinking back on my 33 year addiction to smoking, I never used excuses.  I just smoked.  It was socially acceptable to smoke, that is until it wasn't.  Not long after I quit, my college no longer allowed smoking on campus.  That would have been a bummer for me as smoking was the only break time I ever took.  Oh wait...I never again took breaks after I quilt, either.

Excuses are excuses and until we come to realize that is all they are, and recognize them when they jump into our heads, nothing is going to change.  I don't deserve anything food wise.  I like things...I can choose to eat them...but I don't deserve them because I'm tired or stressed, just like my sweet tormented manipulative alcoholic neighbor kid doesn't drink for the pain.  The pain is only...yeah, it's only an excuse.

Happy spring.

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