Well I finally did it. I simply woke up one morning and decided it was time. It could have been the fact I had to roll off the bed like a Weeble. It could have been because I had trouble sleeping at night at times, sleeping with a pillow for side support. Or maybe it was because I was just tired of looking like a beached whale at times. But I did it. I **ONCE AGAIN** joined Weight Watchers. I needed to wait a few days before I could attend a meeting, but it was a definite decision.
I lost a great deal of weight before I had knee replacement surgery two years ago and thought I was strong enough to keep it off. I wasn't. I lost and then regained 60 pounds all within a year. I was not happy with the way I looked, but that unhappiness didn't keep me from continuing to eat richly and in bulk. In truth though, I enjoyed life. I did activities. I went places and did things. Generally I was a happy person. And yeppers I was waaaaaaaaaaay overweight.
I went through what everyone seems to go through when it comes to losing weight...maybe it will come off on it's own. Maybe I should try this diet plan or that diet plan. Maybe surgery is the answer. Maybe there was a miracle drug that will make my life completely different. What really held me back is that I didn't think I could do it. Why bother, I thought. It was too much work--day in and day out, counting points, counting calories, weighing food, worrying about portion control. Besides, I'll just fail again.
I rejoined Weight Watchers because I knew I was going to die of a heart attack. I just felt it coming on and I didn't want to die. Two days after my decision, on September 19, 2008, I walked back through that door in Vancouver Washington eager to get on with this project.
I am going to keep a blog of this journey in order to help myself keep track of the process. I am also posting weekly pictures of myself as part of my motivation, hoping that it motivates me when the going gets rough or I get tired of the battle.